Of Strength and Courage...

Being strong and courageous is all Bullshit. When people say "Wow, you are so strong, how do you cope? I swear I wouldn't have been able to handle it, I would have just died.." They have no idea what they are saying. There is no choice involved. Life doesn't come knocking on your door, saying "Hey there, this is life... I just wanted to ask you... Are you strong enough to deal with sickness, calamity, death etc, or should I knock on the next door?"

I mean it just doesn't work like that. Things just happen, and you live with it. Because you don't have a choice. I mean what are you gonna do? Are you gonna say "Umm no thanks, I'd rather not get attacked by polio and be left crippled all my life. I'm not strong enough to deal with that." So, you get the polio... too bad... you live with it, you smile, you put on your bag and go limping to school everyday. And people around you whisper "What a strong girl she is... look at her coping..."

Six months ago, when I heard about a cousin's marriage failing in a few short months, I shook my head with pity and thought to myself secretly "Man, I seriously think I would prefer death to a divorce". Eight months after my wedding, I'm planning a vacation with friends after I get done with my divorce hearing in court. Just the other day, my sister told me "Man, I don't think I could have coped like you have. To tell you the truth, I think I'd rather die than get divorced. You are so strong".

People are not strong or weak. They are just lucky or unlucky. The lucky ones say "I couldn't have coped. I don't know how you do it." The unlucky ones write articles like these at 3 in the morning...