Ramblings of a wanderer - Nada R. Quraishi

Ahoy there,
Just felt a need to chronicle my funny little thoughts and my poetry so here goes...

Lo and Behold
Stories Untold

Forgotten memories
Unwritten Histories

A hope, A dream
A World Unseen

Friday, July 21, 2006

A matter of perspective…

As my old friend Newton said, “The definition of every object is based on a frame of reference.” The meaning of things, the understanding of situations, right and wrong – is all a matter of where you are standing. It is a matter or perspective.

I recently heard an incident where an Imam was asked what his stand was on the accusation that the women is Islam are backward or oppressed because they are covered from head to toe. He replied that it was all a matter or perspective. How would it be if Islamic women thought that all western women are whores because they are undressed from head to toe.

I am not trying to belittle anyone. I am not taking sides. In fact, I am trying to explain that there are two sides, even three, four, or a bazillion to every argument.

What I am trying to do is to take away that injustice that we do to others around us simply because we do not understand that most things in life cannot be defined or understood only in one way.

I have often been questioned about my hijaab or why I cover up, and even ridiculed because I find nothing abnormal in walking on the beach and even into the sea fully dressed. Well, I guess it never struck the person in question that I may find it equally abnormal that someone would walk around half-naked anywhere at all, much less in a public spot.

What is established and accepted as the norm in one part of the world, or in one section of society may not fly at all in another. Then who decides what is wrong and what is right? Who defines what is ridiculous and what is fashionable?

I have always placed a huge importance on being fair-minded and as I live in various parts of the world, and interact with different societies – I have begun to understand how hard it really is. Take the war for instance. Iraq and USA. On the one hand, I can understand how the mothers of US soldiers out there getting bombed may feel. But I also understand what the Iraqi families whose homes are blown away for no reason are going through. Heck, I even understand how the insurgents and the guerillas must think.

Wouldn’t the perspective of someone who was brought up on one set of beliefs and values be very different from someone from an entirely different sphere of the world? But aren’t both justified in their own outlooks?

Let’s take Kashmir for instance. Is it of any surprise that a Kashmiri child who was raised to the sound of gunfire feels right in fighting for freedom and claiming a state of his own? Whereas an Indian child feels very vehemently that Kashmir should remain a part of his great country. So if you cross over the border of a state, the spelling of “freedom fighter” changes to “terrorist”.

It all comes back to the perspective.

I spent my childhood in Jeddah. I know people from other cultures who have lived in Jeddah as well. I loved it there. They hated it. It is understandable. I had a wonderful childhood… all the food was halal… and the life-style was Islamic. I once had an American friend try to convince me for an hour how bad a place Jeddah was, how there was no freedom there. But here I am in the land of liberty, and I cannot eat what I want to, and I stick out like a sore thumb most places I go.

My friend is right in his frame of reference. But I am not wrong in mine.

I am not asking anyone to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. I am merely asking people to recognize that we all wear very different shoes!!

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Broken Wings...

I write this from the airport as I wait for my flight.

I had heard once that the waves of time are like the rising tide of the sea. They always push a person backwards… back to the shore… back to the starting point.

Somehow the story of my life seems to be spun around airports. I have always flown to some new destination whenever I started a new chapter of my life. And as I grew up, I traveled alone more and more often.

And here I am once again, with my laptop slung over my shoulder. Making another business trip. Traveling alone once more.

So, this is nothing new and I have merely gone back to my solitary travels. But there is now a difference. A subtle difference if you look at the set of my mouth, and a drastic difference if you look deep into my eyes.

Before… I used to wonder if I’d meet my soul-mate on this flight or the other, and never fly alone again. Before I hoped and dreamed that I’d settle down and build a nest. Put my wings to rest.

And then it happened. I got on what I had thought was a one-way ticket to heaven, with a companion for life. But it turned out that I was forced to take a return flight, all by myself, after a very short-lived and unpleasant trip. With some new baggage and some old.

Now… I see myself traveling on interminably. I wonder if the waves will keep pushing, and if I’ll end up at the same point again and again. Like all these people around me…in expensive business suits… with worry lines around the eyes… sipping coffee alone in a frequent flyer lounge somewhere.