Restless...

Chaaha thha jaisa waisa hi jeevan toh hai magar
Ab aur kis talaash mein baychain hai nazar
Dil ko nahi hai koi shikaayat kisi k saath
phir bhi koi kami si hai kyun zindagi k saath

yun toh guzar raha hai har ik pal khushi k saath
phir bhi koi kami si hai kyun zindagi k saath

(Jagjit ghazal written by I dunno who)

I don’t know why but for the last two days - i feel so restless. It’s not even the kind of elated feeling you get when you sense that “something wonderful” is going to happen. It’s this anxious, gnawing feeling as if I’m missing something, missing the point, missing the plot. Like I’m forgetting something, or I’m supposed to be somewhere else.

Yesterday this feeling grew so much that I just took off for a short walk in my gulley to clear my head and still my restless heart. And as soon as I set out, I noticed that it was wonderfully cloudy and deserted out – the setting just seemed special. And then, I saw a butterfly, which is not a usual occurrence where we live. It was this beautiful blue and black butterfly flitting around and when I beckoned to it, it danced all around me. I was wearing a blue and white outfit and I guess in a fanciful moment – it seemed to me that this matching colored butterfly had been sent to tell me something, and I took it to be a good sign from Allah. Maybe something wonderful is around the corner after all…